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When I think back on the life I have lived it was hard not to see it as tragedy. So much of my life I’ve been medicated or ill. 11 years on prescription pills and I’m only 28.

After meditating I have come to view it as more of a comedy. I’m alive aren’t I? I should have good spirits. So much of it was just a human experience. I can’t laugh at it all but I’m taking everything a little more light hearted.

If I only knew then what I know now! I’d make decisions based on love and not fear. My history is painted now with colors of emotions. It’s not so black and white. I’m a rich individual, rich of experience and failures. The only thing that matters now is that I don’t give up. Coming out on the other side. It feels like all of my trials and tribulations were meant to push me forward. Show me that it is possible to recover. I tried so hard in the wrong directions. If I can try that hard at something that isn’t the right path I’m damn sure even a little effort in the right direction will catapult me into the places I’m truly meant to be.

Regret should have no home in my heart. Gratitude is the only thing I can do to take charge of my past, because I certainly can’t change it. My future awaits!